Bella Hadid is getting candid about the mental health struggles that plagued the past few years of her life.
In an interview with Wall Street Journal Magazine, the supermodel spoke frankly about the “excruciating and debilitating” mental health battles she’s engaged in these past few years. Caused in part by “the anxiety of paparazzi” waiting outside her home, Hadid admitted that she hadn’t relied on a stylist in “a long time, maybe two years now,” and grew particularly anxious about her outfits and appearance.
“In the last year, it was really important for me to learn that even if people talk about my style or if they like it or if they don’t, it doesn’t matter, because it’s my style,” she told the outlet. “When I leave the house in the morning, what I think about is: Does this make me happy? Do I feel good in this and do I feel comfortable?”
She also spoke about her unusual Instagram activity in November, when she posted multiple sobbing selfies.
“I would just be in excruciating and debilitating mental and physical pain, and I didn’t know why,” she said of the inspiration behind the photos. “[When I posted them] it was to make sure that anybody that was feeling that way knew it was OK to feel that way.”
Hadid added that she would “have really depressive episodes and my mom or my doctor would ask how I was and instead of having to respond in text, I would just send them a photo,” which kickstarted the idea of using Instagram as a mental health aide rather than a perfectly curated portfolio.
“It was the easiest thing for me to do at the time because I was never able to explain how I was feeling,” she said. “Even though on Instagram things look so beautiful, at the end of the day, we are all cut from the same cloth. I felt like it was just good for me to be able to speak my truth and at some point I wasn’t able to post nice pretty pictures anymore. I was over it.”
Hadid concluded by saying that things are looking up in 2022, and that she learned a lot about herself through all the hardships.
“I do have good days. Today is a good day,” she told WSJ Magazine. “My brain fog is feeling better, I don’t feel depressed. I don’t have as much anxiety as I usually do.”
“But tomorrow I could wake up and [be] the complete opposite,” she added. “That’s why I get so overwhelmed.”